Ephemeral

As the earth spins the sunlight dances on the canvas of the atmosphere creating such profound yet fleeting beauty that is often admired only with the naked eye. Today I'm grateful for the sky. An unending source of inspiration which is constantly changing, gracefully and violently, subtly and obviously, day after day without ending. At times it is mind-bending.

For what it's worth, I love this earth.

This planet we call home, the one we freely roam.

With ancient trees and inland seas,

Mountains tall with countless waterfall,

Truly the best, North, South, East and West.

Traveling up and traveling down, really we just travel around,

This giant sphere, from far and near.

Such an amazing place, for this crazy human race.

Porquoi? ¿Por qué?

Why the French? Why the Spanish? Why do I love to learn different languages? Why does why start with a P, in French, Spanish and Italian? Why do I ask so many questions? Why am I having a hard time finding balance?

I wonder how much time I spent on the beach that day as I walked along searching for and picking up what I thought were the perfect shaped stones. Specific ones that I hoped would stack on top of each other, intentionally sized up and then balanced one by one, on top of the other, on top of a piece of driftwood. It was done slowly and carefully with just enough time to snap a photo before it toppled over scattering the stones randomly back onto the beach. Is finding balance always like this?

Is this always just the way it goes? We have an idea and set our intention to create some sense of balance in our life only to have the pendulum start swinging again. The equilibrium we found is beautiful for a short period and then it's gone. All that's left is a fleeting memory and maybe a photo of what it looked like. Then we attempt to find it again in so many different ways...

Porquoi? Porque...

Why? Because... I supposed that's just the way it is.

Same as the only constant... change.

Viral Blog?

Iceberg Lake from Chain Lakes Loop trail, Washington State, Summer 2017

Is it possible to have a blog go viral? I've heard and seen plenty of viral videos and was just thinking about that in regard to my YouTube Channel. How can I make one of my creations go viral? How does it happen? Is it just plain luck or do I need to do something completely cool, totally outrageous and get it into the right place at the right time? I really want to figure this out because I'm trying to build my platform for launching these super cool books that I have been working so hard on.  Not only that, I want to have more reasons to put more effort into making my videos better. I know I can make them way better if I spend more time on them but why bother if only a few people are going to see them?

I was just looking at the statistics on my Eleven NW youtube channel, it's not so popular these days and though I gained one subscriber this month I lost two. Now part of me knows that I need to do these things because I love them and not for any other reason. The other part of me feels like I could do more if I have some sort of ultimate goal in mind with a bigger plan.  I guess I'm looking for a purpose in my creative endeavors. I suppose I will always take way too many photos, write, run, hike, hula hoop, make videos, play music, paint, sew and share my adventures but I wish there was some more beneficial reason for not only doing and creating but for sharing them.

How do I engage an audience I don't have or even know how to get? I'm working on it with social media but it seems like I could do more. I just wonder if all it would take is one viral video, one viral blog post that could get me discovered by more people who could benefit from my quirky personality and unlimited adventures with lots of fully illustrated ways of sharing them. How does it happen? How can Joy Love and ElevenNW go viral?

Watch me. 

Please, Like, Comment, Follow, Subscribe, ReTweet, Share, RePost, and Tell your friends about this crazy woman from the Northwest who wants to bring more Joy to the world!

Falling

17 days in a row and I was close to breaking my streak today... it's almost midnight and I've been struggling with what to write here today. There's too many things on my mind, too much to put into words, especially after that movie, "The pursuit of Happyness" tugged at my heart strings & opened the flood gates. 

My emotions are like fluid falling down the mossy rocky face of my heart with a steady stream of thoughts feeding the flow as my pulse races toward the path of least resistance. It's kinda blurry with the motion of combined energies running through my veins and surrounding me clearly without being seen. I wonder and wander within the depths of my consciousness searching for the purpose to unfold, hoping I'm able to keep bending before I break because there's so much at stake. 

Outside Options

The interurban trail bridge at Arroyo Park today on the way back from Chuckanut Falls.

The day after Thanksgiving, also known as Black Friday or Buy Nothing Day depending on which extreme direction you sway, is full of options. One of the best options in my mind, regardless of what the day may be labelled, is to get outside. I always feel better after I get out in the woods and get some fresh air. Even a simple walk outside usually clears my head better than anything else. Its hard for me to imagine all those people who choose to go shopping today but I'm not here to judge either. To each their own, really, I just want everyone to be happy. Truly happy. I wish life were easier for all of us, in every way possible, today and everyday. That's all. And I'm thankful most of us have so many options to choose from as we go about our lives.

Gratitude

Happy Thanksgiving!

Yesterday at Cherry Point Beach, Washington.

There are so many reasons to be consciously thankful on a regular basis and this holiday is a good reminder to remember. I feel truly blessed just to be living in the Pacific Northwest where the mountains meet the sea and natures playground surrounds this amazing community of people. I could tell you all the things specifically that I'm grateful for today, but it would take a really long time.

Basically, life is good, I'm healthy, I'm happy, I love my partner, my family and my diverse group of friends and I feel loved and accepted in return. This earth is amazing, this life is a gift, the food I get to eat everyday is wonderful, this tonic water I'm drinking right now is perfect and I could go on. It's good to be alive and I'm thankful for it all. 

Pineapple Express

It is only late autumn yet it has been feeling as cold and heavy as winter, that is, until the Pineapple Express arrived late yesterday evening. The concrete on the back step twinkled with condensation from the fifteen degree temperature change that occurred within what seemed like seconds. I awoke this morning to golden sunlight streaming in the windows and laid on the floor like a cat to bask in the warmth.

After the coffee kicked it I got dressed for a run and immediately turned around to come back inside. I was over-dressed and smiled as exchanged a long sleeve fuzzy thing for a sheer tank top. It was windy and gloriously warm out, I could almost smell the green coconuts and plumeria. Today I'm grateful that Hawaii sent some love my way.

I'm sure the mountain folks were all stoked for ski season and the rapid snowmelt probably made their hearts sink. I know it will get cold again soon but it was really nice to have a tropical reprieve and get some much needed Vitamin D therapy today. Thank you Hawaii and the forces of nature, it truly is a beautiful thing how the weather can change so quickly and I do appreciate the variety. Aloha! 

WTF?

Why The Face? I wonder what is going going thru this high mountain squirrels mind...

I was trying to figure out what picture to use for tonights blog post and stumbled across this image, then I was trying to come up with a title and WTF to write about on day 12 of my blogging streak. This was perfect, WhyThe Face? I think my face has looked like this recently, thought I'm not sure exactly why. Could be that I haven't been sleeping very well, and maybe had some gluten contamination too, and my hormones are doing strange things again, as they usually do a few days before my period arrives. So WTF is appropriate in a lot of the ways you could use it here. Why The Funk? What The Fuck?

And Wednesday Thursday Friday are the next three days in a row after today so maybe tomorrow I'll have something better to say...

Herbalism

Photo by Mark Goodman

I'm a tree hugger, thats for sure and I'm especially awe-inspired by the ancient ones that have healing properties. I love to use plants and herbs in my everyday life, in fact I'm drinking herbal tea as I write this. It's Chamomile tonight since I have been trying to mellow out. I keep having these moments of anxiety that make my chest feel so constricted I almost forget to breathe. And I'm not exactly sure what's going on, all I know is I have to get to the root of the issue and I'm using all the tools I have at my disposal. Herbalism is one of the things I'm fascinated by and I keep learning more about it every day. There are so many plants that have healing properties and it's quite fascinating to discover new ones too.

Since I learned about this amazing tree, also known a Western Balsam Poplar, I've been seeing it everywhere. The leaves this time of year are mostly laying a pathway of pure gold color beneath their trunks. After the first big windstorm I collected some of the heady smelling buds from fallen branches and have them soaking in sweet almond oil to extract the medicine for possible later use. The scent is distinct and brings about some strange sense of nostalgia for me that I think may even be beyond this lifetime. I may just go take a whiff right now and see if that calms my nerves. 

Even though I know logically it will all be okay something seems to keep getting in my way.

My mind paces and my heart races.

I wish I understood more now than I did before. 

Wandering wondering beneath a tree, waiting for the moments when I will clearly see.

Like Cactus

I was perusing old journals tonight to try and get my timeline straight for the book I'm writing but I got distracted by words. I just thought I would share one of my woah moments as I was reading a piece I wrote left-handed on January 5th, 2004. As I was reading it I couldn't help but make edits so this version a little better in my opinion. 

Getting better all the time

Writing Left but making it rhyme

Hearing sound without a doubt

Ambidextrous is what its about

Change is constant moving along

Growing faster than a song

Moving gently down my path

Unavoidable is my own wrath

Damn this ego in my mind

Control is something I must find

Within my body there is a light

Ethereally it shines so bright

I must face the demons in my head

Or else I may be better off dead

This book of my life

Cuts like a knife

So I keep on turning the pages

Throughout the ages

Everything is like a mirror

Reflecting the lessons to reach beyond fear

Love life and life loves

Learn & Know

Like cactus...

Harsh environments help us grow.

Journal notes written left handed and a random photo of me with this huge piece of rose quartz at some party some night on the island of Kauai during that same time period. Life is funny.

Déjà vu

Do you feel as if you have already seen this blog post? Somehow, though logically you don't know how that could even be possible and it doesn't really make sense. Sounds kinda crazy doesn't it? I get that feeling too often to just write it off as just some memory phenomenon with a fancy french name.

What if it's happening because there is a glitch in the system? What if everything quantum physics has discovered is really the truth? If time and space does not actually exist... linearly, as we usually think of it, then that means all potentiality exists at once. Anything is possible and we as the observer bring it into form by focusing our attention on it.

But who is this observer we reference inside of each of us?

What if we have lived many lifetimes in many different bodies in many different ways? What if we currently are living out multiple potentialities at once? Is that what the glitch is? Did we actually just remember a snippet from a life we lived exactly like this one we are living now but on a different plane or from a different perspective or in a different part of one of the multiple universes?

Or is it just because we tuned in as the observer on a certain wave form that leapt into particles? Or maybe we all can see the future or we can predict the future somewhat enough that our brain creates a memory of an event just as we imagine it but before we are conscious of it and before we physically experience it.

I'm not sure. 

Last night we were watching a movie and one of the main characters was talking about writing a book in which one of the characters was perpetually experiencing Deja Vu. And I thought, hmm, thats interesting, I would read that book, I can relate to that feeling. I'm also curious to discover more about this phenomenon because it happens at certain moments of my life and leaves a lasting impression. Sometimes it happens even during the most mundane moments, like washing the dishes, (which makes me shake my head, because of course, I've already done the dishes so many times before). Yet it's a much more profound and specific feeling than that.

Anyway, I could amuse (and abuse) my mind with these concepts the rest of my life but I have to eat ice cream and finish writing my book proposal. Still I can't help but let my mind wander and continue to wonder. In fact what if I already wrote this blog post and this book, (on some level) and all I have to do is remember?  Either way, enough of this pondering Déjà, I've got to do something else to get something else done.