1000 Words

A view of my hometown from a bike ride on the waterfront last Tuesday. It was a gorgeous day in Bellingham!

Yes, I have a very full schedule. The demand for custom canvas and upholstery work is quite high. I am grateful for the work and thankful to have a successful business but as I may have said before sometime here somewhere that it is tricky being a one-human show. I wear all the hats and accounting is not my strong suit. Being that 2022 just ended I’m trying to get all my paperwork organized and tax stuff lined up. This is one of my least favorite things. 

Also being a new year and realizing that I’m almost 40 years old means I am more determined to set aside time to write this year. I have an accountability buddy lined up and we have agreed to write at least 500-1000 words per day, 6 days a week. My ultimate goal in this agreement is to finish some of my books this year. 

I currently have several 1/3 to 1/2 way finished potential books. I’m even printing out a hard copy of my other private journal that I have been keeping since 2016 which has almost 30,000 words. I started a new digital Journal this year because, yes, I do keep some of my wild thoughts private however I’ve even considered publishing the whole thing raw. It would be fascinating and embarrassing yet I think if someone else were to do such a thing I would probably want to read it too.

Ugh, the printer is struggling, so much for double sided printing. Wow, that was a big paper jam. Such is life, always throwing us those curveballs and distractions but I am determined to focus. After I finish this blog post which will fulfill my per day word count goal, I plan to go do some yoga, take a shower, make some tea and then read a book in bed. 

By the way, the strangest thing has happened. Since I returned from my recent adventure I have stopped drinking coffee. It’s been over a week and I’m surprised to say I have been sleeping better and waking up around 7am every morning. I wonder if it’s a coincidence or a fluke but time will tell. Either way, better sleep means a clearer mind and more time to be productive. I have been getting a lot done since I returned home and remain coffee free. We shall see how long it lasts. I have always wanted to be a morning person, maybe my time has come?

Anyway, I was motivated to share more of my sea story and pictures too however a picture problem is arising from trying to download my iPhone photo’s to the computer. I attempted to download from the cloud earlier instead but they all got jumbled and I became frustrated enough to jump to the next task while I try to come up with a better way. I take far too many pictures and videos which wouldn’t be an issue if I were more organized and efficient when it comes to storing and sharing them. Just another thing I resolve to get better at. On to the next task for now but I will share more later.

Amazing

And then sometimes I want to just be a photographer! I went out and took photos of the Start of Round the County a week ago from yesterday. Not only did I not want to freeze my butt off by doing the race, I didn’t have the time to commit to the full two-day event. Thankfully I have an awesome friend in Anacortes with a beautiful powerboat who took us out to take pictures of the start! I have missed racing in this event that I used to take part in for 10 years in a row so it was lovely to at least witness firsthand the excitement of Saturday morning. It was also a fabulous sunny day!

It recently has come to my attention multiple times that you are actually reading my diary/journal/blog/website! I have to admit I’m a little embarrassed to know that people (you included) are actually exploring my website and reading my words. Its great, don’t get me wrong, Thank You for being here and reading. However, it had always felt safe to assume that I was putting all of this into the ocean of the internet as but one tiny droplet of information and now I feel like a visible wave! How vulnerable I feel to know that you now know some of my personal innermost thoughts and feelings.

Does this mean I should stop oversharing?

I am running a business after-all but I am also my business so therefore you should know who you’re dealing with right? All my flaws and imperfections plus opinions and ideas laid out on the table for all who want to look can see. A little scary, I guess I had my head in the sand sort of when sharing here.

Now that my eyes are open maybe I shall curate my content a little bit more? Like the photo below, I probably should post the new pictures of the work that was just completed on Icon. However the perfectionist in me thinks that the images I took of the work are not good enough. There is still a lot of other work happening in and on the yacht and therefore I don’t feel appropriate sharing images yet before she is complete and clean. I have good intentions to share them later. Time flies and my intentions although good often can’t keep up with the pace of life. I’m doing the best I can.

Thanks for understanding and Thanks for reading. Time for me to get back to the sewing room!

A very old picture of me at the helm of Icon (a Perry Designed 65' Sloop cruiser/racer) on a delivery.

I used to co-manage the Icon program and was a vital member of the racing team. I love sailing and I very recently completed a bunch of canvas work for this beautiful yacht as the owner is planning on cruising her again after an almost 10 year hiatus.

Icon was for sale for a time and if I had had the money I would have purchased her in a heartbeat.

Day Dreams

I’ve been day dreaming and painting again too! And still sewing up a storm. And teaching yoga!

Mixing work and play. Summer is here!

New Business Venture

https://www.purelyspirit.com/ This is so exciting for me! And my goodness it’s just another thing on my list of loves and to-dos but I have major help with this one thanks to my friend and new business partner Charles Crooks . Charles is super talented in energy work, tarot and much more and he is currently also the master of all the the Social Media for Purely Spirit! I have been blogging on the PS website and working on the details for our first in-person workshop. Please check him out and check out the new website then let me know in the comments what you think. Thank you!

Happy Love Day

It’s another wildly commercialized holiday today and we get to choose whether or not to celebrate it. In my humble opinion we should choose to celebrate every single day! Life is short so why not celebrate it as much as we can and focus on the love? It doesn’t have to be only on holidays however if you feel you need an excuse to show and/or tell someone you love them then today is the day to do it.

The history of “Valentine’s Day”, like so many of the holiday’s we celebrate, is dark and murky. It’s hard to say exactly how it originated and the truth could possibly be a lie anyway. Why not just take it for what it has become as a day for love? There is no time like the present and the beauty of being human is that we get to assign whatever personal meaning we want to our own experiences.

We also tend to prove ourselves right whether we know it or not. What stories have you told yourself about this “Holiday” and how do those stories affect the way you feel? Is it possible you could change those stories to something else that makes you feel different- good or bad? Shift your focus maybe, from one bad experience to one good one or from what you don’t want to what you actually do want.

I used to tell myself that “Valentine’s Day” sucks. I held on to the memories I had of unfulfilled hopes for romance and expectations from partners that left me with feelings of general disappointment. Many times all I felt was sadness on a holiday that is supposed to be full of love.

One thing I have learned the hard way for sure, is how to love myself enough that all that other shit doesn’t matter. I proved myself right long enough to know that I don’t want to repeat that story anymore. I’ve had enough of the personal suffering from expecting to be disappointed. I choose to expect that today is another day and Love is always something worth celebrating. I don’t need chocolates or roses or sparkly gifts but I love them and it’s okay to love those things too so long as they don’t determine my happiness level.

So I wish you a very Happy Love Day today!

$20 bill

I'm still disturbed by the fact that I heard something fall out of my pocket this evening and didn't check to see what it was. I'm bothered by my lack of ability to respond properly when this situation occurred. A sweet boy came up holding a $20 bill and told me he found it under the chairs where we were just sitting. I checked my pocket remembering the sound I heard as it hit the ground and recalling how I had stuffed it there the day before after my friend Kay bought a hula hoop from me. I checked my wallet to make sure I hadn't put it away but forgotten. I took the $20 from him and was grateful but honestly I can't remember if I said thank you. I was too busy checking to make sure it was actually mine though I already knew that it was. I was shocked honestly and thrown off my ability to respond. Afterwards I thought maybe I should have just let him keep it as a Thank you for being honest. Either way, I am grateful he returned my lost $20 bill to me. Just another reminder to stay present in the moment, I think my mind was somewhere else or I would have handled it better. At least I know there are still honest people in the world.

Speaking of honesty, who hit that button today? The one that sent out the "False Alarm" to Hawaii? And why did that happen? Can you imagine the nightmare everyone experienced today in those moments between the warning and the recall? It's hard for me to believe that it happened and I feel deeply for all those people who had to experience it directly. Talk about a shocker. I was shocked by some silly little mishap with a $20 bill. I'm just thankful it was a false alarm and a massive tragedy was avoided. I really hope something good comes out of this. I think about how life can change so drastically or end so quickly. Better make the most of the unknown time that we have. I'm sending out lots of love to everyone all over the world right now and praying that we all can see clearly to make the most out of what is most important in our lives.

Marathon

I fully admit I am afraid to commit to doing another full marathon but part of me really wants to do it in spite of my fears. I’ve only done one full one once and I like the idea of doing another but I understand the amount of time and dedication to training it takes. 

There is so much I hope to accomplish this year. I wonder if this fits with my overall plans. I’m scared and excited. I may need to spend some time and write it all out then contemplate the big picture. 26.2 miles seems like a long way to run but then I think of all those ultrarunners out there who do that distance for training runs. How do they fit it all in to their lifestyle?

If they can do it so can I? But then I wonder why... why do we run? Why do I run? I love the benefits of being a runner for sure but why do I want to push myself to go farther? And faster? Why do I always want to do more? Pushing myself to see how much I can accomplish, how far past my comfort zone am I willing to go? There must be a good reason for all of this.

Isn’t that the beauty of being alive?

Daring to Dream

Here we go... I've done my research. I've poured my heart and soul into writing this proposal for HayHouse and I hope that my dreams will soon come true. Even though it scares me to think of what may happen after I send it off tomorrow I just have to trust that whatever happens will be meant to be. I've put in the effort and I will keep on dreaming of bigger better things as I continue the journey that is my life.

The original title was going to be Bonsai or Microcosm but after hearing James Van Praggh speak at the writers workshop I changed my mind but had no idea what to call the book. When I was on the plane flying home from Hawaii it dawned on me that the whole story was really about Love versus Fear. Often times I avoided doing things I loved out of fear. Fear that I wouldn't be trusted by the ones I loved the most. I sacrificed the things I loved to make things work in so many relationships I found myself in.

Love gives us the courage to face our fears but often times the fear of losing love can also create more fear. Especially in relationships, which it almost seems as if my whole life I've been learning about Love and Fear from some of the people who have been closest to me. From this I've also learned that above all else it's important to love and to trust myself first. I'm the only one that knows whats best for me and the truth always reveals itself eventually no matter how much fear we have regarding scenarios in our lives and our personal relationships.

Love & Courage

In honor of the super full moon tonight.

Of course my retired teacher friend would point this out when we were playing a round of disc golf today. He asked about my blog and whether or not there was a theme to it so I explained how I've changed my theme to relate to the title of the book I'm working on. Immediately he said something about how it's dualistic in nature and that its usually opposites- like Love and Hate or Courage and Fear. I was concerned at first that I had made some sort of mistake.

Then it hit me like lightening, the power of words brought clarity into my mind. They are inextricably linked, Love and Courage, Hate and Fear. It helped me to realize how much love has given me the courage to do things far from my comfort zone. Love has inspired me to move past so many of my self-imposed limitations no matter how much it scares me. Love is so much greater than fear and it's still all so relevant to what I'm trying to convey by sharing my intimate story. We all can learn how to consciously choose love in moments where we need courage the most in order to be able to move beyond where we have been. We have so much potential and the truth is that in love, with love, it is, we are, limitless. 

Theme Time

I was reading the book Platform again last night and decided to heed some of the advice since I really want my book launch to be a success. I've been working on my elevator pitch and last night before I went to bed my head started spinning with ideas. I wrote some of them down in the notes app but I'm uploading a hoop video to youtube right now via Videoshop on my iPhone so I can't access it at the moment since I don't have iCloud set up to sync everything. I suppose I don't need that info just yet anyway, I have to remember to do one thing at a time. I seem to always have three steps in mind at once and then I wonder why I get overwhelmed.

Today I am going to start to narrow down the focus of my blog so that my posts are relevant to my book and the message I am hoping to send out to the world. I realize I can be a bit scattered because I love variety and have so many things I'm passionate about. But I need to start building a solid foundation for actually attempting to make some sort of living off of this book that I feel will be of real value to a lot of people. It's a crazy love story with all kinds of lessons I have learned with its unfolding. 

Love Versus Fear is the title and the theme to come in the following blog posts will be about how we can choose to become more aware of how we are making choices in our day to day lives. Are we acting out of love or fear? After reading another perfectly timed blog post by Pam Grout today I think I've figured out how to do this. Her stories are always inspiring and uplifting, reminding me of the theme in her books which I always need reminding of. I think we could all use her reminders actually so I'm going to put my own spin on the same kind of thing and attempt to focus on the love. Why? Love versus Fear is a constant battle we all have to fight and I want Love to win for all of us.

Please, like if you like it, comment and share with anyone you think may enjoy what I have to say.

Thank You. 

Falling

17 days in a row and I was close to breaking my streak today... it's almost midnight and I've been struggling with what to write here today. There's too many things on my mind, too much to put into words, especially after that movie, "The pursuit of Happyness" tugged at my heart strings & opened the flood gates. 

My emotions are like fluid falling down the mossy rocky face of my heart with a steady stream of thoughts feeding the flow as my pulse races toward the path of least resistance. It's kinda blurry with the motion of combined energies running through my veins and surrounding me clearly without being seen. I wonder and wander within the depths of my consciousness searching for the purpose to unfold, hoping I'm able to keep bending before I break because there's so much at stake.