How can I help?

We all eventually reach a moment in our lives (hopefully) where we question our purpose. What if our reason for existing is directly linked to everyone and everything? Evolution is the solution to all the problems of the present. Therefore the answer to the question possibly lies in how we can help others evolve?

The problem with the English language is context and comprehension. We can say one word which has a myriad of meanings. I currently “help” people make their yacht’s better by creating custom covers and new upholstery which provides protection and comfort for those who can afford the luxury of having a boat. I love my clients/customers and many of them have even become good friends over the years for which I am super grateful.

Yet the truth is, I struggle with imposter syndrome and perfectionism which leaves me full of anxiety. My hair is gaining more silver streaks to show for the stress of my profession. Many days I wonder if I need to change my career direction. Maybe my skills and abilities can be put to better use elsewhere? How can I help myself be less stressed? Because isn’t it important also to help ourselves before we can continue to help others? They say, “put your oxygen mask on first”- if you pass out you can’t help anyone else- the logic makes sense. To continue to help others we must help ourselves.

What if helping ourselves means changing the way we operate and breaking the ingrained behaviors that seem so normal we often don’t question them? Change is challenging to say the least. I’ve been asking myself many deep questions lately. What is my purpose here on earth in this female avatar meat suit during the time of the patriarchy? A time where the President is a convicted Felon and the government is obviously so corrupt he can’t seem to be stopped?

How can I help myself and the world? I feel I must do something but I keep wondering what. Time moves quickly as one’s timeline compresses over the years. I thought I would be in a different place in my life. I want to be a writer because I think sometimes that my words might help somehow. I know my words will only help if my intentions are good and clear but also if my words can be seen. It takes a lot to get seen in the age of smartphones and social media. There’s so much and so many overwhelming distractions. The overstimulation of the modern age is taking its toll on us all. And I have to make money to be able to write and it all takes time.

I suppose part of my problem is seeing the interconnectedness of it all at once. How can I simplify? I just wish to discover what my specific quality is that I can use to both help myself and others. In my work I help people with their boats and in return get the funds needs to help provide myself with basic needs and some fun. But I want to do more…. I want to do better. I’d like to help in more impactful ways.

I want to help protect the planet and all of its inhabitants. I want to help humanity work together globally because the earth is our only means of surviving and thriving. I want to insist that we all celebrate the diversity yet collaborate and promote health, equality, education and inclusion for humanity. How can I help the world and myself evolve quickly?

Right now, the need to act feels overwhelming, as authoritarian forces in the United States threaten our country, economy, and ecosystems. But how? What can I do?

So I write, I wonder, I hope, I pray and I get back to work so I can eat, pay the bills and exercise. C’est la vie!