False Alarm

I wish I had a bigger platform to stand on so I could share what I know in my heart to be true with more people and have them listen. If only for the fact that I want to live in a world where peace, love and happiness prevails. I wrote a post on facebook after midnight last night, technically I wrote it very early this morning, so I'm copying and pasting it here for my blog for today. We all have fears and we all know that love can help us overcome them.


Here's what I wrote:

I’ve been thinking about this since the false alarm that occurred recently. I was inspired to write this after a friend posted a link to a news article regarding an explanation for the major mishap. Regardless of why or how they say it happened, the fact is, that it happened. And since it happened it really made me think about how life can change so drastically in an instant based on even a supposed threat. Just imagine what it was like for all those people who received that message and acted accordingly thinking it was “real”. In that moment it completely changed their lives.

Looking at the bigger picture here I see that what’s more important is that humankind as a species comes to a point where we can eliminate the need for such a warning system altogether. The fact that we still have to worry about getting missiles fired at us is a big problem.
I believe humankind is evolved enough by now to realize that we share a very small planet.

This earth is our home, it does not have boundaries or borders. We are all dependent on the health of the ecosystem in which we live. This system is completely connected in every single way therefore we are all connected too. What we do to one thing or one person or one country effects everything on this one earth that we all depend on for life as we know it. We need each other and we need this entire planet to survive and thrive. We can no longer think about competing against each other, about fighting between countries or firing missiles at one part of the earth without realizing that we are only fighting ourselves.

Ultimately we all want the same thing but the beauty in our diversity is that we have multiple ways to get what we want and what we need. There is more than enough for all of us, we have the technology and the capabilities to solve our biggest problems if we just choose to do so. We all need to choose to do so. I have a dream where it’s one global community here on planet earth. A community that understands the importance of taking care of each other and the earth that sustains us. Humans have the potential for curing diseases, ending poverty, eliminating hunger, celebrating our cultural differences, learning from our mistakes and creating a world that is healthy for every single one of us.

We can live in peace, it is not only possible it is absolutely necessary that we choose to believe in that probability. It’s more obvious than ever that it will take all of us choosing to change our core beliefs. We must believe in the power we have to make different choices because we now realize that we have that choice. We have to choose to spread the word and to work together to make these changes happen.

The time is here for a revolution, we need to act fast before it’s not just a false alarm. We all know what would happen then. Let’s choose to focus on the power that we have to set in motion a new direction for humankind. Not everyone will jump onboard right away but with enough love and compassion it will become clear that we must take whatever steps we can to keep the shift moving toward what we want. 

Deep down we all just want to be happy and healthy, to have time to experience the beauty of this life and solve problems that make the world a better place and make our lives less challenging to survive. Once we realize that we can only be truly happy & healthy when we all are then we will work towards helping others and this earth in order to help ourselves. And right now we all need all the help we can get.


I saw a lot more eyes today so maybe I haven't gotten the full message yet. Eye Wonder...


999 also appeared repeatedly today... in fact it seemed everywhere I looked there was another sequence of those same numbers. Technically I know what it means but I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do with that information.

I guess I'll just keep moving forward with eyes open and hope the path will be revealed along the way.

Yoga was definitely good for me today, I went to Flow Motion out in Ferndale to try the Infrared Hot Yoga class and the heat felt wonderful. I'm doing my best to trust and have faith that if I keep doing the things I love everything will work out.



Hate is a strong word that I avoid using or feeling. However, I more than just "dislike" the feelings I feel in association with lies and being lied to. I fully admit that I hate it. I hate feeling like I'm being taken advantage of too and it makes me really angry when this happens. Why do people lie? It doesn't matter if you're the liar or the one being lied too it just doesn't feel good. I do my best to be honest because it feels better to tell the truth.

How do I shift back into Love from such a strong negative emotion? How do I choose to feel happy when I am feeling mad? I want justice. At the same time I want to let it go. Torn with emotions over such seemingly simple concepts.

Why is it so hard to trust my inner radar? Because I always give people the benefit of the doubt.

I see what I want to see which usually means seeing the best in everyone I encounter. However I deserve honesty. I just want to shake this subtle feeling of betrayal. It's the car thing again. They said they wanted to make it right but why don't I believe they have my best interest at heart? And how can I prevent someone else from ending up in my position?

By telling the truth I suppose. The truth is going to come out after I gather a few more facts and evidence for my case. Soon I will report the full truth here and I will do it as unbiased as possible. Then everyone can come to their own conclusion regarding this car buying saga of mine.

Costco Connection

A shot from the best Road Trip of 2017!

A shot from the best Road Trip of 2017!

I just happened to notice a little box asking to share a story about a Road Trip in this months issue of the Costco Connection magazine. The first thing I thought of was driving through the desert this last summer with Mark for an unexpected work trip to Ontario, Oregon. 

 I thought it would be a good exercise to write something up and send it. It will be interesting to see if they decide to publish it.

Hooping in the desert sun.

Hooping in the desert sun.

It was full of everything I love- adventure, exploration, hot springs, scenery, hula hooping, sunsets and time with a man who stole my heart. Just like that mini road trip was unexpected so is our relationship. We never expected to be together, we didn't have any idea from the very beginning what this was or what it would turn into. We still don't know how its all going to turn out. I shake my head and wonder what it all is. We have some connection that is for sure beyond this lifetime, it may even be beyond time itself. 

All I know is that life is a hell of an adventure and I just want to enjoy it as best I can. I can take life much too seriously at times but I know life is supposed to be fun. Even though we all struggle at times I guess it's just happens that way to provide contrast for the times when it seems so easy and wonderful. 

Selling Books

#Gagbot Quotes and #Prisma App modifications hooping with a selfie stick today.

#Gagbot Quotes and #Prisma App modifications hooping with a selfie stick today.

I think one of my biggest fears is actually selling my books. Once I get them done then I have to get them out there and once they're out there I have to be ready to hold my own regardless of the feedback I'll probably get. I know I can't please everyone and if my first book is a success it's scary to think of how many people might read it.

Then the more people that read it the more there may be people who don't like it. It's a vulnerable feeling to allow such an intimate look into how my mind works with regard to my personal experiences and perceptions. 

Writing this blog seems safe currently because there are only a few people who even read it. It's going to be much harder to write here when I have a bigger audience because there will be more at stake. At the same time it's also good that I'm aware of this fear and ready to face it.

That's why it's funny that this Gagbot quote is what popped up in the Prisma app when I was looking for a picture to go with my blog post for today. There's so many other things I could be working toward selling that don't make me feel so vulnerable and scared. At the same time I know they won't be nearly as beneficial or satisfying to complete which is why I'm willing to put myself on the line.

Part of it's not really even the selling that scares me, it's finding out whether or not I'm even good enough to be a successful writer. I'm coaching myself daily and doing my best to get past this. I know it's risky but sometimes the bigger the risk the better the reward. I just hope this is the case when I'm selling books before things. 

Thanks Gagbots & Prisma for inspiring this introspection!

Fear > Love


Unfortunately today for me, fear was greater than love. As I went about my day I attempted to remain conscious of how I was making my choices and I soon became aware of how often I take action out of fear. First thing this morning I realized that I tend to wake up and stress myself out immediately. I looked at the clock at 9:30 and felt guilty for still being in bed. However being aware of that I then took the time to write in my virtual journal on my phone while trying to sort through the contracting feelings within my chest before moving on to my usual morning routine.

I fell behind on my task list and still made the choice to go to Elements for some hot yoga this afternoon because I love the way yoga makes me feel. With perfect timing the instructor Lauren mentioned at the beginning of class how it's not necessary to hurry, it's important to be present and mindful. Even though I know better I always seem to be in a hurry these days, so much so that sometimes I forget to breathe. Just another reason why yoga is so good for me when I manage to get myself to go. Later as I was dripping with sweat and my mind had wandered off to other things I could be doing, she mentioned paying attention to our bodies and how often we are all afraid of looking within at how we are feeling. It's so true, I often get so caught up in the future I forget to acknowledge why I feel so constricted and then make the choice change it by shifting my focus. Fear caught me again, fear of not doing enough, but I'm the only one keeping score...

Which reminds me of the profound note from the universe I received in my inbox this morning, it said, "There is no scorekeeping Joy. Everyone lives each day for him or herself, no matter what they did. No one owes anything to anyone, no matter what happened. And from this, what I hope you most get, is that whatever you do next, you do it for the joy it brings you.  Rock on, The universe" (If you haven't heard of Mike Dooley and these notes from the universe I highly recommend googling it as soon as you finish reading this post.)

I tried to take it to heart, it sounds so wonderful and I want to believe that it's true but I still have some bad habits to break. I guess its time to step further out of my comfort zone because I'm used to doing things because I'm afraid of what will happen if I don't.  And that really sucks because fear seems to stop the feeling of joy in its tracks. I'm just going to keep trying to increase my awareness in each present moment each day until I retrain my brain that it's all ultimately going to be okay, I want to feel Joyful again. Life is supposed to feel good. We are all supposed to feel loved and be happy more often than not.

Source: https://www.google.com/_/chrome/newtab?rlz=1C5CHFA_enUS690US690&espv=2&ie=UTF-8

Porquoi? ¿Por qué?


Why the French? Why the Spanish? Why do I love to learn different languages? Why does why start with a P, in French, Spanish and Italian? Why do I ask so many questions? Why am I having a hard time finding balance?

I wonder how much time I spent on the beach that day as I walked along searching for and picking up what I thought were the perfect shaped stones. Specific ones that I hoped would stack on top of each other, intentionally sized up and then balanced one by one, on top of the other, on top of a piece of driftwood. It was done slowly and carefully with just enough time to snap a photo before it toppled over scattering the stones randomly back onto the beach. Is finding balance always like this?

Is this always just the way it goes? We have an idea and set our intention to create some sense of balance in our life only to have the pendulum start swinging again. The equilibrium we found is beautiful for a short period and then it's gone. All that's left is a fleeting memory and maybe a photo of what it looked like. Then we attempt to find it again in so many different ways...

Porquoi? Porque...

Why? Because... I supposed that's just the way it is.

Same as the only constant... change.

Source: https://www.google.com/_/chrome/newtab?rlz=1C5CHFA_enUS690US690&espv=2&ie=UTF-8