The boundary line between destiny and manifestation is obscure. As a clairvoyant I can still be in denial. There are things I know that I resist. Things I want to believe but still doubt. The best way to predict the future is to create it however it seems ones ability to create is limited by certain factors outside of ones control. There is luck involved. There is some form of greater awareness directing parts of each and every life to fulfill some sort of divine design. How? What? Why? Where is the guidebook and the rules?
I didn't get what I was hoping for and I am doing my best to stay positive, trying to believe there is something better in store for me but what? I bit off all of my fingernails tonight. I had thought I had finally managed to stop for good, my nails were nice and long, then, within 4 minutes they were all gone. It does make it easier to type. Sigh... what am I supposed to do now? The signs keep saying one thing, my intuition keeps confirming and my brain keeps saying WTF while my ego desperately wants to knock me down and kick my ass. Honestly, I'm in a strange space...
Regardless, it's time to get to work. I have a large, beautiful upholstery project to finish and then books to finish and self-publish. I even finally listened to another song I wrote, (well, I recorded it in a moment of inspiration) and I think it's worth writing down and learning. I gotta keep moving forward. I know I am still so blessed but this not getting the book deal with Hayhouse has messed with my head. Another valuable lesson to learn I'm sure. Either way this may be the last daily blog post for awhile. I have to spend time on the projects that will provide some income so I can keep doing all these fabulous things I love.
Anyway, I'm done streaking for now. I finished all of the French Lessons on Duolingo and that means I've written 92 blog posts in the last 92 days (including the one after midnight- I wrote another that morning to make up for it.) This is quite an accomplishment I think and I know some day everything else will make more sense to me. Hindsight is something else I will have to look forward to. For now I'll end this 92nd blog post with Doreen Virtues "Angel Numbers 101" description of the number 92 because I just wrote it three times and it hit me I should look it up. Here's what it says: "As you keep the faith that everything is unfolding perfectly with your Divine life purpose, you more clearly see and understand the steps that are best for you to take."
I'll do my best to keep the faith.